Monday, March 30, 2009


Over my lunch break this afternoon I stopped at Barnes & Noble to pick up World War Z. I had assumed that it would hold me over the few days until this little treasure was released.

While exchanging pleasantries along with monies the lovely cashier asked if I had heard about P&P&Z yet. I told her I had heard about it (here) and queried if it was already available. She answered in the affirmative and directed me to the information desk. Her demeanor was so pleasing and her excitement to help a patron was so warm that I was eager to offer Messrs. Barnes and Noble more of my business. You would be quite right to say that my moment with her got me through the following terrible moments with the Lord of the Information Desk.

His unkempt, greyed hair and well worn scowl were sure signs of a person that hated himself even more than he did his job and I would soon learn me as well. His worn down assistant only held himself in his employ because he had to, I assume. I immediately wondered where this young man was in his life that he would bear such a demon's presence and bear it daily. The LotID had just finished his now daily lecture on how the assistant should cut his god forsaken hair, stand up straight and stop whimpering.

It was upon this scene that I imposed myself and the question of the moment, "Excuse me sir, I am searching for a book entitled Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. Could you aid me in my search?" What happened next happened so quickly it is still a blur in my mind only now coming into focus as I write.

The old man's eyes rolled so far up into his head that the action literally bent his neck and attached head in a backwards direction. Stunned I waited and watched to see if his tongue was going to come out next. My penchance for having the least bit of concern for my fellow man was in this case completely unwarranted. He was holding me in disdain and in so much of it that he could not answer me.

At this same time the assistant saw his chance, if but for a little while, to escape his master. His sorrow that his lord wasn't dieing of a convulsion was only slightly tempered by his joy over leading us away from the cruel being and on to my reward. I shant bore you with how long it took to finally get the book in my hands. Just understand that he knew right where it was but we went the long way 'round in order to prolong his all too fleeting freedom.

While the pitiable assistant slowly shambled his way back to his place at the terrible man's side I tried to forget the last few minutes and made my way back to the beginning. The lass and I repeated the same pleasantries but different monies before she realized who I was and asked if I found it without any trouble. I mumbled something and half motioned towards the Information Desk. With sincere understanding in her eyes she assured me, "He makes that same face at everyone."

This Makes More Sense Than Metal Gear Solid 4

Sunday, March 22, 2009

The Future of the Paper

We've argued a few times about the death of the newspapers. Clay Shirky has written an interesting post about the difference between journalism and newspapers, and how the traditional newsroom is doomed, but we don't know what's going to replace it yet.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Ostriches amuse only themselves

In the spirit of lolcats, but with more misplaced anger:

Friday, March 20, 2009

Why Go?

Local rapper P.O.S. covers Pearl Jam.

Just Throwin' This Out There

The Rosebuds

"To the seventeenth-century poet Robert Herrick, rosebuds were a symbol of the fleeting pleasures of youth. Orson Welles made “Rosebud” the dying word of Charles Foster Kane, again a symbol of the tenacity of youthful memory. Kelly and Ivan - The Rosebuds - make music that embodies that certain spirit—youthful, but complex. Not at all fairytale, but magical. Not realistic, but real. Perhaps the way youth actually is. The Rosebuds defy categorization with each new release, like creatures in a myth shifting shape to avoid capture; slippery catfish in a North Carolina river. Mention The Smiths and Ivan will turn his Morrissey croon into a gruff Greg Dulli growl or splash it against some reverb-laden surf guitar. Call them Southern Gothic and they’ll release a dance record. They do not spend time categorizing themselves, each record is simply evidence of new curiosity." -from here. (links added)

They are coming to The Whole at Coffman Union on April 10th. Ten dollars at the door. I kinda want to go to see just how old I am getting.

They have more songs on their myspace. I recommend 'Nice Fox'. I think Gus might like the sound of 'Can't Believe It's Life Like'.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Propane Tanks in Left 4 Dead

So I was playing Left 4 Dead the other day, and I am more than willing to admit I am pretty new at it.

Anyways we were setting up to take on a horde of zombies, and I was told to shoot a placed propane tank when they came.

I dutifully threw my Molotov on it then shot it, and was ridiculed for wasting my Molotov. Of course I was ridiculed for being so foolish. WTF! O

Okay, obviously it is just a game. You can't really heal yourself from being mauled by wrapping an ace bandage around your leg, nor slam random pills to get a health boost. Still, you do expect SOME real world interactions. If I fall, I am not suprised when I take damage. When I fall off a tall building I am not surprised that I die. In fact, I don't have to have my character fall off a tall building and die to learn that. I simply assume that it implemented that way in the game. In the same manner I assume if I run through the flames left by another player's thrown Molotov, my character would take damage.

I don't know why it was so surprising that I thought you needed to provide a 'spark' to the propane. Afterward I found some more around and shot them. They explode, but in a very non-dramatic fashion. Heck, I suspect I have accidentally shot a few and didn't even notice.

In retrospect, maybe I should have assumed if they didn't bother with adding some sort of incendiary to the gas can, they'd apply the same rule to propane tanks. Even still, the magnitude of the propane tank explosion was pitiful.

Here's how it SHOULD work.

Molotov = as depicted in game is fine. The small fire it produces is fitting.

Gas Can = should have a road flare tied to it. When you drop it/throw it, the road flare is lit. You simply then shoot it to make it blow. The medium sized fire it produces is fitting.

Propane Tank = should be a two-step process. Step 1, throw a Molotov (or some other existing fire) Step 2, pierce tank. This should result in a HUGE fireball, and the tank should go flying and bouncing around, knocking over anyone it hits, potentially bouncing back right into the survivors.

Even if you skip the road flare or Molotov to ignite Gas Can and Propane Tank, the itty bitty bang is just not acceptable.

HERE are some vids of propane tanks (properly engulfed in minor flames first, you will notice) DO behave. Having seen stuff like this first-hand, the deafening boom is rarely caught, and even when it is, it does not do justice to the chest thump you feel.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Happy St. Patrick's Day

My brother and his wife had their baby today. Of course I figure 1/365.25ths of the world population can claim that achievement. Not many can claim to be born on St. Patrick's Day with red hair though.

It Could Have Been So Much Worse

This parody may be an exaggeration, but it's pretty much equivalent to what they did to "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" when they adapted it for TV.

Saturday, March 14, 2009


Got an extra hour and half? Please watch this documentary Scratch. If anything check out the first ten minutes -- the opening will teach you more about hip-hop than most folks know.

No embedding, so watch it here.

Friday, March 13, 2009

This Probably Isn't That Great

But I will tell you after I complete the game and get all of the achievements. FFTA2 + Tower Defense = Crystal Defenders.

Don't bother sending me all the bad reviews either. I already read them all.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

This Week's YouTube Genius

I give you Kutiman. Long live cut and paste.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Puppets are So Very Subversive

I stumbled across this little gem on Minneapolis Public Access at 5:05 this morning and it sent me at a run to Google. I give you Billy and Sally's Big Abandoned Refrigerator Adventure!! (Mature themes)

You're welcome.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Everything Old is, um, Re-presented

Don't Look Back is a flash game take on an ancient tale in the style of ancient (relatively speaking) computer games. The old-timey platforming really annoyed me the first time I played it but I let it sit for a couple days, took another crack at it, and left the experience satisfied.

Like many of the best flash games it's short and sweet, so give it a try. Even if you hate it, you won't have to hate it for long (and it will cure you of embarrassing yourself by maintaining publicly that "Pitfall" was an awesome game).

Monday, March 9, 2009

Hose', wanna carpool?

Toys R US

Yes We Can

Best Product Placement Ever?

Not sure if this counts as a shill, but the 1st half of Dreamgirl is another fun parody (also see Jizz in my Pants), while the 2nd half can't hurt our sales next year.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

This post is for Tim,0,1616907.story

First the cops attack the guy, then they lie about it and he is hit with felony battery on a police officer, the the video surfaces. The prosecutor amends the charges to resisting arrest, and eventually drops them.

"Fort Lauderdale police internal affairs investigators reviewed the incident more than a month ago and found no violations of policy or procedures, said Sgt. Frank Sousa, the department’s spokesman."

WTF is that?

If such behavior is allowed under department policy, the entire policy should be trashed.

These specific officers should be nailed with Perjury, False Arrest, assault, and civil rights violations, and spend some serious time in jail themselves. that more of what you were looking for last time you went fishing?

World of Goo: $5 on Steam

World of Goo

$5 on Steam this weekend.

'Nuff said.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

D&D Character Builder Is Up

The rest of my work day is full and ruined at the same time. The Beta is over and the long ago promised tools are finally here. (I don't know the exact day it happened; I do have some sort of a life you know.)
So, DOCK!, when will our group be back up. My Warlord is eager to train jerk-of-a-Mayor's son on some more Kobolds.

Monday, March 2, 2009

5th Amendment and compy passwords

From Ars:

"The privilege against self-incrimination, a federal court has ruled, does not bar prosecutors from forcing a defendant in a child pornography case to decrypt his laptop hard drive—reversing a 2007 decision that found the demand to enter a password equivalent to compelled testimony."

Full article.


Sunday, March 1, 2009

Place Dorks

Globetrotter XL! Is it more geography quiz or more fine motor skill test? You decide! I can't seem to get past level 7, so I may be a typically geographically challenged American after all.
I came across this game on Kongregate.

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